The reason Chelsea Handler has worked as a late-night talk-show semi-pundit and Netflix documentarian is the same reason most late-night hosts can pass as political commentators: Nobody represents the other side. Not the guests, not the audience, and certainly nobody on the networks.
That’s not quite how it works on the internet. When you put something out there that’s ill-informed, readers can respond. And one very ticked-off Navy SEAL responded in a major way to one of the comedienne’s dumber tweets.
Ms. Handler, for those of you not familiar, is a perfervid believer in the theory that Donald Trump is the Muscovian candidate, a man installed by the machinations of Vladimir Putin and unable to do anything without pre-approval from his handlers in the Kremlin. (I mean, except for arming the Ukrainians. Or conducting two air strikes on the Putin-supported Assad regime in Syria. Or… )
Last month, Handler retweeted anti-Trump conspiracy theorist Brian Krassenstein, who believes that everything the president does is ALL CAPS-proof that he’s CONTROLLED by VLADIMIR PUTIN and his HANDLERS in the KREMLIN!!! His Twitter feed is fun reading, particularly if you have some sort of inexplicable animus against lower-case letters.
Regarding the tweet in question, Krassenstein had equated Trump’s criticism of NATO allies’ refusal to meet their cost obligations for defense as (of course) proof that Trump was being used as a marionette by Russia. Surprisingly for Krassenstein, the only thing in the tweet that was caps-locked was NATO, which is admirable restraint for him.
Handler added her own spin on Krassenstein’s evidence-free extrapolations:
Putin is giving trump talking points and actions to take to help undermine the very country he is from. We have a domestic enemy running our country pissing on about allies who shows fealty only to Putin. This is not America. This is Russia. https://t.co/kyBwTMwiHd
— Chelsea Handler (@chelseahandler) June 11, 2018
Oh, well, I’m sold. Sound logic there. Unlike “Chelsea Lately,” however, opposing voices are able to join the conversation on the internet, and unlike Ms. Handler and Mr. Krassenstein, some of them actually make sense.
One of them is Eli Crane, a former Navy SEAL who was deployed to Iraq three times and is now the CEO of Bottle Breacher. In a letter to Independent Journal Review published Sunday, Crane said that the June 11 tweet — which came as the president was about to negotiate with North Korea — was more proof Handler needed to “remove (herself) from (her) protective Hollywood bubble.”
“Chelsea, please stop. Your comments about the president being a domestic enemy while he was negotiating a nuclear peace deal with the North Koreans are not true or helpful,” Crane wrote. “Nor are your recent comments about the first lady, her broken English and her ‘dumb jacket’ while visiting refugees at the border. This seems to be standard operating procedure for you on the heels of your criticisms toward Ivanka and her sitting on her father’s lap for a photo op. We get it, you hate the president, his family and his entire administration.
“Sadly, your comments are not hurting the president or going to achieve your ultimate goal of getting him impeached. It just reminds the rest of us in the ‘silent majority’ how far removed and triggered you and your buddies on the left really are.”
Unlike Handler’s audience and guests, Crane said, most people are “not fooled or reversed by you or your equally delusional peers in Hollywood, your interviews or your Twitter tantrums.”
“We understand that you all have a lot to be upset about. Not only did the celebrity businessman who you all made fun of and told us didn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of becoming president prove you all wrong in one of the biggest presidential upsets in history. All of you also told us that the economy would fail, a hotheaded Trump would most certainly start a nuclear war and that the Mueller investigation would prove undeniable collusion with the Russians,” Crane said.
And, while a lot of people in Hollywood and/or Crazyville (the respective cultural residences of Handler and Krassenstein) still believe that collusion will be proved, the evidence doesn’t seem to be bearing this out. Crane wrote that perhaps a bit of travel will solve Handler’s issues. (No word from Crane on what will solve Krassenstein’s issues, but I’d personally recommend Haldol.)
“Chelsea, do yourself a favor and remove yourself from your protective Hollywood bubble and travel around a little bit to the rest of America to get the pulse of the people here,” Crane wrote. “Start with those flyover states and the people there. You know, the ones that you and your elite pals seem to resent so much.
“Talk to Americans in Nebraska, New Mexico, Idaho and Montana. Ask them why Trump’s approval ratings are higher than Reagan and Obama’s at the same time. Ask them if Trump is a ‘domestic enemy.’ Ask them if Trump’s tax plan and the economy is affecting their lives. Talk to them about immigration, border security, MS-13, sanctuary cities, school safety and gun control. Try really hard to not dismiss their opinions and label them racists, bigots, homophobes and much more because they don’t agree with your position.
“Chelsea, we all want you and your Hollywood pals to continue to enjoy your First Amendment rights to freedom of speech, even Tom Arnold and De Niro,” he added. (That would be comedian Roseanne Barr’s Trump-hating ex-husband Tom Arnold and the Trump-hating actor Robert De Niro.)
“We even welcome your criticisms and opinions. We just ask that you show ‘some’ respect for the office, if not the man and his family while they are working hard on issues that affect us all. Donald Trump is far from perfect, Chelsea, but he’s much further from a domestic enemy.
“If you checked your hatred, anger, and criticisms for just a second, you might just realize why the rest of us are rooting for them and not joining you as you root against them,” Crane said in conclusion.
What are the chances? Well, consider one of Handler’s most recent tweets as of this writing: “As someone who knows nothing about basketball, I’m just happy LeBron will be making more money than Trump.”
Sure, she’s happy now. Just wait until Krassenstein tweets about how Putin made Trump engineer LeBron’s signing with the Lakers so that he could bet the Russian federal budget on the Celtics winning the Eastern Conference next year. What will she think then?